The heat pressed down on me yesterday. A headache was coming. After I called it a day at work, I had a choice to either head straight home to a hot apartment or take my $25 gift card to Barnes and Noble in air conditioned bliss, after which I would pick up a healthy dinner to bring home, rather than add to the stifling heat by cooking a meal.
At Barnes and Noble, I browsed through the shelves, mainly staying in the fiction section. I was going to go to the writing section, but then I thought better of it, and continued to sift through the fiction. I saw many possibilities. An anthology caught my attention. I took a photo of the book’s cover so that I could remember it for later: Tablet & Pen: Literary Landscapes from the Modern Middle East edited by Reza Aslan. As I made my way through the shelves, I came upon a small literary studies section. I pulled a few books and flipped through. It was just about time for me to go fetch dinner. I would have to face the heat outside. I rubbed my head a few times, not wanting to take my pills just yet. I would see if the headache would remain at its low note and would fall back into itself. I found my book here in this section. I’ve always enjoyed reading Harold Bloom’s literary commentary. When I read his words, I feel as though I am sitting in on a very interesting and intelligent lecture or conversation that I can keep coming back to—I am a fly on the wall absorbing his knowledge about literature, which he is clearly passionate about. His book that I chose is The Anatomy of Influence: Literature as a Way of Life. I’m looking forward to diving deeper into his book. It will be a nice slow read taken in little sips.
Exiting through the front doors of the bookstore, I am wrapped in stuffy heat. One more stop and then home bound. After I picked up our dinner, I was walking to the car and heard my cell phone ring. I thought it would be my significant other, but it turned out to be a call back from a job I had applied to a week back. When I sent my resume, I honestly did not think I would hear from them, so I was taken aback by the call. I stopped walking and found a quiet corner on the street so that I could learn more about the position. I was glad to have been called back and quite thankful. We reached the end of our conversation and agreed to a meeting. The owner appreciated my honesty. If all works out, this will be a second part-time position; I will remain at my current part-time position. I gave my current boss a head’s up some time ago that I would be looking for a part-time position, but that it would have to be just what I was looking for, which isn’t always easy to come by—hours, location, job specifics, etc. I will let the boss know today that I have made progress in my search and see how that goes.
Nothing is certain at this point. All I know is that it feels in alignment with my intentions. The only other intention that I have been thinking about is of preparing one of my writings for submission. It will take some time. It will be a personal sharing with fiction elements: Creative nonfiction. I will be happy when I send it away because that will be more than enough. The action—the doing becoming reality—not just thinking about it, and as I’ve mentioned before, I’m not as concerned with acceptance. Because of how my road has been, just sending my writing out is a HUGE step. That in and of itself is satisfying. The time will come.
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Fly on the wall...
I enjoy being a fly on the wall observing and sharing your life, Rebbecca. I hope the second part-time job turns out to be perfect for you. I understand your pleasure in thinking you will have the courage now to submit your writing. I always bragged on myself when I submitted anything--whether it was accepted or not. I felt rejection slips were evidence that I was trying. No submissions mean no possibiities of publication.
Thank you so much for your
Thank you so much for your kind words, Sue.
Slowly but surely the courage comes. It dwindles at times, but I try to keep pushing myself along. I need to do some editing to my piece and then I will submit. : )
I agree with Sue. Buy the
I agree with Sue. Buy the stamp and send it off. It is an exhilarating feeling. Good luck with both new job and new possibililties. m
I will buy that stamp and
I will buy that stamp and send it off (once it’s ready, of course). Thank you for wishing me luck on the job and new possibilities!